Why the Seattle Seahawks will win Super Bowl XLVIII


Perhaps you’ve heard the Seattle Seahawks of the NFC and the Denver Broncos of the AFC will play in Super Bowl XLVIII, the National Football League’s championship game, on Sunday.

Countless analysts appeared on television this week giving their “expert” opinion as to what team they think will win. The truth is you don’t need to know anything about football to know who will win the Super Bowl.

Seattle will win. Here are 10 reasons why.


The NFC champion is 6-5 in the Super Bowl in years the FIFA World Cup takes place.


The NFC champion is 3-1 in the Super Bowl since Chris Christie became New Jersey’s governor.


Teams that wear white jerseys in the Super Bowl are 29-18.


The NFC champion is 21-13 in the Super Bowl since McDonald’s introduced the Happy Meal.


The NFC champion is 4-2 in the Super Bowl since Mad Men premiered.


The NFC champion is 3-2 in the Super Bowl in years a new New York City mayor takes office.


The NFC champion is 9-5 in the Super Bowl in years a Big Ten school wins the Rose Bowl.


The Broncos are 0-3 when they wear orange jerseys in the Super Bowl.


The NFC champion is 13-7 in Super Bowls in years a venue hosts the game for the first time.


The NFC champion is 14-9 in even-numbered Super Bowls.


Based on these facts, the Seahawks will win on Sunday. How will they win the game? What players will make the most impact? Will Richard Sherman take a bite out of a microphone if Erin Andrews interviews after the game? That’s for the football “experts” to figure out.



Bryan Paul’s Puzzling NFL Predictions: Divisional Playoffs



Though many fans expect thrills from the National Football League postseason, last weekend’s Wild Card games weren’t exciting. The Houston Texans defeated the Cincinnati Bengals in a game neither team seemed interested in winning. The Green Bay Packers showed mercy towards the Minnesota Vikings and their backup quarterback, Joe Webb, winning by only 14 points. The Baltimore Ravens held off the Indianapolis Colts as Ray Lewis celebrated the last home game of his 17-year career by dancing, dancing and dancing some more. The Seattle Seahawks survived an early two-touchdown deficit and a poorly kept FedEx Field playing surface in their victory over the Washington Redskins. After earning a week off, the Atlanta Falcons, Denver Broncos, New England Patriots and San Francisco 49ers join last week’s winning teams in the quest to reach Super Bowl XLVII.

Once again, this post will consist of four miscellaneous facts broken up into quarters to choose a winner in each game. In the event of a 2-2 tie, a fifth “overtime” fact will determine the prediction.

You don’t need to know anything about football to enjoy this analysis. Enjoy these unique NFL divisional playoff predictions.


Baltimore Ravens (11-6) at Denver Broncos (13-3)-Jan. 12-4:30 p.m.-CBS


First Quarter

Baltimore played Denver in Week 15. The Ravens enjoy rematches in the postseason. Baltimore is 6-4 in playoff games against teams they faced during the regular season.

Baltimore, 1-0



Second Quarter

The Ravens, formerly the Cleveland Browns, played their first season in Baltimore in 1996. The Chicago Bulls defeated the Seattle SuperSonics in the 1996 NBA Finals. In years the Bulls have won the NBA title, Denver is 11-1 against AFC North teams. But the 2013 NBA Finals won’t take place until June.

Baltimore, 2-0



Third Quarter

The Bulls began play in 1966, the year the Beatles released Revolver, their seventh studio album. In years the band made a studio album, Denver was 30-78-4. Luckily for the Broncos, the Beatles last studio album came out in 1970.

Baltimore, 2-1



Fourth Quarter

Tina Fey, a co-host of Sunday night’s Golden Globe Awards, was born in 1970. She was a Saturday Night Live cast member from 1997-2006. The Ravens won five playoff games during Fey’s Saturday Night Live career. The Broncos won eight.

Tied, 2-2




Fey created the sitcom 30 Rock. The show premiered on Oct. 11, 2006 and NBC will broadcast its final episode on Jan. 31. Baltimore is 30-32 on the road while the show has been on television. Denver is 31-26 at home.

Denver, 3-2

Bryan Paul’s Pick: Denver

Pollock’s Pick: Denver


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Bryan Paul’s Puzzling NFL Predictions: Wild Card



The National Football League’s Wild Card weekend features four intriguing games. The Cincinnati Bengals hope to avenge their playoff loss to the Houston Texans last year. The Green Bay Packers’ defense will try to keep Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson from running all over Lambeau Field. The emotion of Chuck Pagano’s return from leukemia treatments and the possibility of Ray Lewis playing in the last game of his career come together as the Indianapolis Colts return to their original home to play the Baltimore Ravens. Robert Griffin III and Russell Wilson will help decide whether the Washington Redskins’ or Seattle Seahawks’ surprisingly successful season will continue and, perhaps, which rookie quarterback will win the Associated Press Offensive Rookie of the Year Award.

Bryan Paul’s Puzzling NFL Predictions finished the regular season with a 149-106-1 record.  Though Chuck Pollock of The Olean Times Herald won the predictions competition by 22 games, the playoffs give this unconventional prognostication method another opportunity to test traditional techniques. During the postseason, these posts won’t follow a specific theme as they did in the regular season. Rather, each game will consist of four miscellaneous facts broken up into quarters to choose a winner. In the event of a 2-2 tie, a fifth “overtime” fact will determine the prediction.

You don’t need to know anything about football to enjoy this analysis. Enjoy these unique NFL Wild Card predictions.


Cincinnati Bengals (10-6) at Houston Texans (12-4)-Jan. 5-4:30 p.m.-NBC


First Quarter

The Bengals and Texans played in the Wild Card round last postseason. Wild Card rematches have occurred three times since the NFL playoffs expanded to 12 teams. The team that won the first matchup has been 3-0 in the second game. Houston beat Cincinnati 31-10 last year.

Houston, 1-0



Second Quarter

The NFL playoffs expanded to in 1990, the year Warner Bros. Pictures released Home Alone. In years a Home Alone film has come to theaters or has been released straight to home video, the Bengals are 34-49. Fox Television Studious produced Home Alone: The Holiday Heist in 2012. Luckily for Cincinnati, this is the first NFL game of 2013.

Tied, 1-1



Third Quarter

Macaulay Culkin played Kevin McCallister in the first two Home Alone films. He dated Mila Kunis from 2002-10. The Bengals wish Culkin and Kunis maintained their relationship. The Texans are glad they broke up. Since 2010, Cincinnati is 23-28. Houston is 30-21.

Houston, 2-1



Fourth Quarter

Kunis has voiced Meg Griffin on Family Guy since 2000. The Bengals wanted Lacey Chabert, the original voice actress, to keep the role. Since 2000, Cincinnati is 0-3 in playoff games, including a loss to Houston.

Houston, 3-1

Bryan Paul’s Pick: Houston

Pollock’s Pick: Houston

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